Freshed up late

Every time when a student enters into her/his first year in whichever course, there is always one fixed dish in her/his menu. That is the freshly fresher’s party. But for the batch 9 of IFMR this was served late and cold. After a accelerating first month of regular MBA workload the batch9 finally got it fresher’s party invite scheduled on 4^th August 08. Like they were separated in groups for the subjects, here also they found a divide but interestingly on the basis of ethnicity. A ‘selective and (un)biased’ random grouping was made and people were put in so called groups of Mallus, Punjabis, Haryanvis, Assamees, Tamillas, Gujjus, Marathas, Biharis, Bengalis and Rajasthanis. The U.P. waales, Kannadigas, Kashmiris, Oriyans and Andhrawalas became angry as there was no quota for them and there was uproar in the sansad regarding this allocation of machos and babes to the various states.

Without bothering these outside problems the batch9 people started thinking on a macro level and were excited, trying to find the solution to the following major critical questions which were affecting their micro heart

1. To whom shall I dedicate what song? ( by the lovebug affected ones)
2. With how much make-up should I paint myself? (by the beauty conscious ones)
3. What will be menu for the dinner? (by the gastronomical ones)

The d-day arrived with quite a few people having found answers to the above questions and lots having multiple choices for the questions. Classes went on like a bee-buzzing for a lot (except the fans of PKV). Few students started their preparation before the lunch itself, taking the risk of bunking OB classes expecting high returns in the evening (or in the forthcoming encounter with the churning Sherry). The afternoon computer 2 hours of computer works came with a debt waiver ½ hour (rather than the promised 1 hour) for the make-up-ically downtrodden people. Having just 1 hour for the start of the party the seniors and the less beautiful genders of the batch 9 got ready and were beginning to arrive at the venue. Having forgotten as how to read time or unable to spot their watches and clocks or getting stranded in the city the darlings of the batch9 arrived about 1 hour late to the venue. They were escorted to the party hall with due respect by the elders. It was like a state function and the babus being waiting impatiently for a lately arriving political guest not minding the presence of the recipients or audience.

After the arrival of the ‘busyness’ models the party kick started with the ethnics ramp walking and being interviewed. People spoke out their well practiced dialogues in their respective languages and ramp-walked gracefully¹. There was a Gujju Goyal and his koyal in their traditional dresses dancing all around. The Haryanvis were bit ruff and tuff with their dandas and dr.goondas. Marathi manoos were too good with a changla mulgi. Luckily they were in a small numbers, or else the biharis and the tamilians would have been attacked. The mallus were too ooaabvious with theirs oas and their plain (g)old dresses. And there was a mallu born, american brought up Punjabi with the mallus. The tamilians girls were homely and the guys like eM.eS.Dee rascals. This time the Biharis babus weren’t bhikaris, but rather in a full-flow of their fhasht, afficiyal and melliphuous bihari. The assamees didn’t show up their dance, the Bengalis missed to do the ‘korbo lorbo jetbo re’ song and the Punjabis weren’t that body-shoddy.

In between the ramp(age) walk there were few known dedications being exposed off and the respective heroes and heroines danced to the romantic tunes (not to mention a sentimental bhai-behen song). A lot of dedications weren’t unearthed due to the time constraint (hope the ‘senior’ spokesperson releases the list through mail).

After the dedications there were around 1+1+1=3 events conducted showcasing the creativity of the elders². Then the Mr.Freshers and Ms.Freshers were announced with the honours going to the Bihari babu and the Marathi Mulgi respectively. Dinner was announced and the eaters filled up their stomach while the beauty conscious ones changed gear from ethnic to western. The party floor breaked open with good music and the odourless smoke spreading around. Some danced gracefully, some normally and some carefully as to protect their legs being stamped upon³. Music rocked for two hours and all the permutations and combinations of grouping, energy of the dancers were exhausted. Then a bakra was brought to the center and he was anointed with cake. After finishing the remaining cake the party broke up and the people left with memories of the fresher’s party being remembered as a delicious, memorable and sweet ice cream served late and cold.

¹ – except the author who was spitting all over the place.

² – The author punctured his butt to win a chocolate in one of the events.

³ – Though being careful the author eventually got stamped upon many times.

Proactive defense statement: The author wrote this post around the time when he should have slept. So there may be quite a few mis-statements about the fairer sex or about the elders or about the ethnic groups due to inconsistent brain performance at the time of writing. Hence please ignore the mistakes which the author has made.